Does a wish fountain feel like a whore?

My shitlist - 08
An ode to the worst this year had to offer:

"Nagle Speaks"

Arguably the worst linkster name for "Misomusy". Ever since the inauguration of "Nagle Speaks" the traffic on this blog has plummeted. I give you "Emerging Iranian Voice", maybe the greatest linkster name ever created, and this is how you repay me. Congratulations, you've been shit listed.

Kenny vs. Spenny

This show has ruined my life.

Ralph Nader

I had constantly plugged this populist since early June because I believed Nader was capable of organizing a coup d’état against the current administration. He has proved himself to be a hollow Hugo Chavaz.

Leon

You are a piece of shit. I wish you had been stolen alongside Goliath and sold off piece by piece in an alleyway on the outskirts of Harlem. I ask you again Leon, what is your major malfunction?

58,343,671 Americans

This mitten full of intellectual bankruptcy voted for a ticket with the name "Sarah Palin" on it. No one looking through a prism of reason would vote for a category five moron who believes that the Iraq war is a mission from God and that global warming is occurring independent of human activities. Conveniently, this number also covers the Christian Right and its army of flagsuckers who worship the state.

Breakfast at 66 Maddie

Most hyped breakfast in all of Toronto. The residents will tell you that the sleeping conditions are poor but that's okay because they have "the best breakfast in town!" All talk. Dystopian toast burns, an under supply of dairy products, and the realization that you've just been sleeping on the w--- pillow will have you sliding down the grimy fire escape before you can say "liars."

Redeemer

You breed super Zionists and uncultured robots. Could someone please send Redeemer some Canadian assimilation packages? Also, I know I signed up for Liberal Arts but this is getting immoral. I have now dissected a fetal pig, a sheep's heart, and some bovinian's eye. I am now qualified to withstand long periods of unpleasant odours and use a scalpel like Vince Li. You made me say that Redeemer.

Candy

My glucose levels are always in flux. You give me two minutes of a beautiful high and then drop me to the carpet and make me drool and reach for the bag again. I will break my addiction from you. I'm just not sure I can handle the withdrawal. I need supervision. Perhaps Thursday and Friday.

"Canadian Elections

What was this about? Asides from Layton proving that he could run a campaign on the strength of two words “Kitchen table” and “Corporations”. At least we got to see Dion play hockey and now we have some Green party memorabilia."-- Everything said in this goes for me too, especially the part about Green Party because I now run entirely on solar energy.

Hollywood
Perhaps your civil right causes will be taken seriously if you stop turning California's garbage into films.
Goodnight everybody!