We got into a tussle with some local farm boys over a golden pond. Some words were exchanged and some fisticuffs materialized. It was a solid rumble for myself until some dehydrated, blood-thirsty fellow speared me in the chin. My blood sprayed artistically into the cold winter air -- like a Tarantino flicker -- and I fell into the snow with my arms flailing, effectively making a red snow angel. My attacker then vampired me and headed back to Avonlea.
I received several stitches, and my bloody humanity personified Humpty Dumpty. My doctor threatened that he would of sliced me up himself had he been playing hockey with a Toronto Maple Leaf-wearing anti-hero.
According to wiki-How, I can remove these stitches myself and thus defer an annoying journey to Uxbridge to see my family doctor. All I need are tweezers, a small pair of scissors, hydrogen peroxide or alcohol, and a magnifying glass. The latter will be the most difficult to obtain; I am not a scientist, nor am I a sadist who torches ants (for more information on ants see Tom Waits).
There is a warning attached to this page, relating to the danger of removing your own stitches but, hey, Leon does it.
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4 comments:
Oh no. Looks like you need to relax and recover. COUGH READ NOTES FROM THE UNDERGROUND
if you need assistance....nags....i offer to be the 12 yr old girl to your leon
anonymous....aka'd as reubs
Nah, I'm in the best shape of my life.
And yes, you may be my Mathilda whenever you like.
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